Think-Yell-Run-Fight-Tell

On February 23 I was assaulted and mugged inside of an elevator by a large man. It was 6:30pm, in a well lit and high-traffic parking garage downtown where I frequently parked for work. I fought, gave him what he wanted, and then ran to safety. While I was lucky that the outcome wasn’t much worse, this horrible incident still left a permanent mark on the lens through which I view the world. 

Determined to regain some sense of control and not let this completely shatter my confidence, I began to think about taking a self-defense class. The options were overwhelming and a bit scary, but I was extremely fortunate to have the support (and phenomenal planning skills) of my friend Nikole. She committed to taking a course with me, researched several programs, and summarized them for me to review and decide.

Thousand Waves Martial Arts and Self Defense Center offered the most intriguing program, because it addressed much more than just a physical response to violence. So on the evening of Monday April 6, exactly 6 weeks from the date and time when I was attacked, Nikole and I began our 4-week self defense course.

We learned that as a self defender, you should share your knowledge with others to help reduce violence. So I will summarize here what I learned during these 4 very intense weeks. The overall theme of the class is that self defense has “five fingers”, and when used together those five fingers make a fist, which symbolizes your own power and strength.

Think: this “finger” represents the skill that you use first. This is your own instincts telling you that something is not right. It also stands for walking with confidence and awareness of your surroundings, and knowing about what does and does not make you feel comfortable.

Yell: this is the second skill that you use. On a primary level, it is as simple as using your voice assertively to tell someone that they offended you. It is also about finding your strongest, loudest voice to tell someone NO, STOP, LET GO or BACK OFF! The power in the room when we would do yelling drills was spine-tingling.

Run: this is next, and notice how it comes before “fight.” The center believes that if you can avoid violence, you should. There is nothing wrong with running away to safety. In some cases, like mine, running is just not an option. So if you are trapped, then you must move to the next finger…fight.

Fight: we spent a great deal of time learning many physical moves to help get out of grabs and immobilize an attacker. It was an awesome lesson in power, endurance and hope. We learned that there are so many tools right on your body that can help you defend yourself. In our many drills, Nikole most enjoyed practicing an immobilizing side kick to the knee and I loved taking my hammer fist right to the “attacker's” temple. I anticipate that after a few cocktails we will be eager to show friends and family all of our “new moves.”

Tell: this last “finger” of self defense was why I decided to take this course. The center recognizes the importance of victims speaking up and telling their story to make others aware and reduce the cycles of violence. Telling is an important part of healing and moving on, and that is exactly what I am trying to do.

Terragusto, Ten-miler & Tweet

This weekend was full of exciting new experiences, and I didn’t venture out any farther than 5 miles from my own front door!

On Friday evening I had a wonderful meal at Terragusto Café on Addison and Lincoln. The restaurant is small and simple in décor because all of the magic happens in the kitchen. Every morning the chef rolls out fresh dough and cuts different types of pasta that will be served that day. These pastas are paired with all organic and locally grown veggies, fish and chicken. The menu is constantly changing because the sauces, herbs and spices are seasonal. We enjoyed a flavorful and fresh 5-course meal which ended with two amazing chocolate desserts. It probably was more food than I needed to eat prior to my next new experience of the weekend…

On Saturday morning I ran the Lakefront 10. This 10-mile race started and ended at Montrose harbor, which is just a ½ mile from our home. The course traveled north and south on the lakefront path and we experienced a range of weather- sunshine, rain and high wind- during the run. Nikole and I trained for and ran the race together. It was great to have her company and positive energy throughout the training and on race day! Pete, Chad and Roscoe also came out to cheer us on and take pictures. I posted a few of their fabulous photos in the below slideshow.

My final fun new experience of the weekend was a delicious brunch following the race. I learned about Tweet from our neighbor’s Joe and Christine. Side note: Tweet was established long before Twitter, and stands for the good ol’ noise that comes from a bird. It is located just a mile north of our house. When we entered it was abuzz with activity and crazy décor. The menu is expansive and all organic, and our waitress was great- she didn’t even mind that we were all sweaty and stinky post-race!

I love the fact that after living in the city for over 5 years, I can still be surprised by new places and experience that are right outside my front door. I was reminded this weekend that there is never a shortage of new things to try in Chicago.

Life's Lessons in a Simile

"The painful things...seemed like knots on a beautiful necklace, necessary for keeping the beads in place."

Last night, I finished reading The Red Tent by Anita Diamant. This simple line, written ¾ of the way through the novel, moved me to tears and prompted this blog post. 

Diamant’s simile poetically gave purpose to the co-existence of joy and pain in life. 

The novel is a beautiful fictional story about Dinah, a woman briefly mentioned in Genesis 34.  Dinah has a hard life, one filled with loneliness, loss and trauma that is difficult to imagine. She also experiences great joy through rich female relationships and love. Even during her times of suffering, Dinah has the ability to find pleasure and meaning in simple things like gardening or enjoying a cup of beer with a friend. With this, she reminded me a lot of Mariam and Laila from Khaled Hosseini’s A Thousand Splendid Suns. 

I admire each of these women and their heroic spirit, albeit fictional, through life's hardships. I am awestruck by their ability to feel joy from the sun’s warmth or a cup of tea despite unimaginable tragedy in their lives.  They give me pride in a woman’s strength and ability to endure, and hope for my own potential.

I have always disliked the cliché “everything happens for a reason.” But now, instead of cringing when I hear it, I will think of the “knots on a beautiful necklace” and believe that life is more beautiful and rich with each struggle that one experiences and endures.

The MCA & Martial Arts

Two times in the last month I have had the following experience: I am sitting somewhere in the city where I have never been, looking around at people who I have never met, and watching something completely new. Both times it caused me to pause and reflect on the possibility that there are hundreds of activities going on throughout the city right at that very moment. I picture the events like little points of light on a city-wide map. Hundreds of active places where people go to learn, to practice a skill, or to be entertained. It is exciting, overwhelming and a bit humbling.

The first of my two new experiences occurred in March at the Museum of Contemporary Art, where I saw Dean & Britta perform alongside the never-before-seen Andy Warhol Screen Tests. My cousin Anthony is the drummer for Dean & Britta, and I watched the band perform in other venues in the past. However, none compared to the intimate setting inside of the MCA with the mesmerizing Warhol films playing in black and white above the band. This was my first time inside of the MCA. I have lived in Chicago for 5 years now, and still not visited every museum in our city. This is something that I hope to change- and actually if it continues to be 30 degrees and gloomy every day this spring, I might be able to accomplish this by June. 

 

The second experience occurred last evening. I began my first night of a 4-week women's self-defense class at Thousand Waves Martial Arts center here in Chicago. This will certainly be a topic in my future blog posts, as I learn more and more from this experience. Upon walking into the front door of the center, I was flooded by a whole new world of martial arts classes for kids and adults of all ages. There was so much activity buzzing inside of the center, and it all had a culture of its own. From the uniforms and belts worn by the students of different levels and practices, to the empowering messages hanging all over the walls, I was once again reminded of the range of art and activity that occurs every day across our city. 

I recognize how easy it is to get caught up in my everyday routine and all of the obligations that accompany it. However when I have moments like these two it reminds me to never stop being curious, exploring and trying new things. The possibilities are far too great to miss.

A Few Words About Words

It has been exactly 5 months since my last blog post. This was not a deliberate hiatus, rather one that simply happened once I came down from the Presidential Election high, and started drowning in a sea of complex and depressing economic news about which I cared not to comment. 

Recently, I found a very cool site www.Wordle.net where a system creates a "word cloud" based on the content of an article, blog, website, etc. The above word cloud represents the key themes from my blog. In looking back at my past blog posts, I find it to be pretty realistic. It also made me want to start blogging again, because I felt that it really sold short my experiences, interests and passions over the past year.

During a session at Google on Friday, someone said "blogging is antiquated," relating it to newspapers and magazine articles where the topics are out of date by the time that they are published.  This alarmed me. With Twitter, Facebook, text messaging and IM, the sharing of information is instantaneous. However, I feel that it lacks depth and eloquence. I always enjoyed writing as a creative vehicle and way to share my experiences with others- and so now I have a renewed commitment to post to my blog on a regular basis. I gave it a new look and feel as a start, (kind of like buying new workout clothes to help motivate you to start going to the gym). I hope to give interesting subjects the depth which they deserve, share my experiences with others, and write with eloquence. Maybe as a result my colorful little word cloud will become bigger, more interesting, and more diverse.